Realising my fears

My first blog post last week was a very general overview of the last 10 years of my life. Although it wasn’t very deep, I felt that it will place perspective on my future posts. 

I want this blog page to come from my heart, so I don’t really have a plan for what I’m going to write about until I sit down to write it. And today is no different. As I begin to write, my thoughts take me to the time I realised my fears. Now that may sound a little strange to you, but I’m not talking bout discovering for the first time I realised I’m horrified of spiders, heights, or roller coasters. I mean the fears I didn’t know I had. The ones that surface when you get pushed out of your comfort zone.

When I first made the decision to pursue my new business opportunity in mid 2016, I had no idea what I was in for. I was completely unaware that it also meant I was about to begin a personal journey of growth and development in order for it to work. I have always been very practical and logical when I have decided to chase a goal – figure out what needed to be done to achieve the goal, break it down into tasks, and then do it! Easy right? Well I approached this project the same way. I did the research, worked out what needed to be done, then stopped….. this was the first time I’d looked at a list and found there were things on the list I really didn’t want to do! I FELT UNCOMFORTABLE.

It took me a little while to understand why the list made me feel this way. So I did some more research into what was truly required for me to run this business successfully. I realised it boiled down to two things. The first was I was afraid of failing. I didn’t want to invest in anything that wouldn’t work. Pretty simple. Not an unusual fear when looking at a new venture, and I was familiar with this fear -I felt it before ALMOST EVERY exam at uni. I knew I could deal with this one, I’d done it before. There was something else. Something bigger than the fear of failing. I realised it was the fear of what other people would think. What they would think about the business, and about what they would think if I failed.

This realisation struck me pretty hard as I have always prided myself on not caring too much about what others think. I didn’t always have the best time at school, and I had developed the ability to ‘not care’ about what others thought of me. I was never in the cool group, and was considered to be a nerd, and I’d learnt to move forward without it bothering me.

So why was this different? Why was this causing so much discomfort? It then occurred to me that I was selectively ok with not caring about what people thought of me. Putting myself out in the public eye, in a new industry, with a new concept was not part of my selection! And heaven forbid I failed!!

I knew, that to move forward with this business, I needed to get comfortable – fast! I wasn’t sure where to start, so I turned to other successful business leaders for answers. I listened to YouTube videos from Tony Robbins, Les Brown and other motivators as well as audio books from other greats that had succeeded in businesses like mine. This took my on an incredible journey of self discovery and growth. I took notes, followed calls to action, I cried and I laughed. I gave myself daily tasks that would take me out of my comfort zone. 

I have realised that to move forward in life, to follow my dreams, and create the life I want for my family, I am going to learn to get comfortable with being uncomfortable. If I stay in my comfort zone for the rest of my life, I am not going to be able to realise my dreams. My desire for change and progress needs to be greater than my fears. This is a daily challenge for me, but I’m ready to take the bull by the horns. Somedays, are easier than others, but little by little, I’m moving towards my goals.

I would love to hear what makes you uncomfortable? Are you comfortable being uncomfortable? Please share your thoughts, challenges, and how you overcome your fears.

Thanks for reading 

K x